Article: 08/-02/12
One Toe in Heaven
My wife had died and I had been taking care of myself since her death. I was a care giver for almost 13 years as we faced the consequences of the brain tumor. I was a bit paranoid when it came to hospitals, doctors and any medical treatments. I had gone through 3 brain surgeries and having total hip replacement during the 13 years with her.
First Wife Got Sick
After a 5 hour delay we were able to reschedule our flight to Florida through Chicago and Atlanta,Georgia. Fortunately I was able to call and alert my parents of the flight problems. I told them that I would call them from Atlanta to tell them when we would arrive at the Tampa airport where they could meet us. Before we left Chicago we said a prayer to help reduce the anxiety we were experiencing.
When we arrived at the Atlanta airport we prepared for the eight hour layover. I was able to keep the boys pretty well occupied watching the other people and airplanes landing and taking off. My wife appeared calm and quiet during this delay.
Finally Arrived in Florida
About 10 PM we arrived in Tampa, Florida and were met by my parents. We had left Iowa at 6 AM and arrivedin Tampa at 10 PM. Originally we were suppose to arrive in Tampa about 1 PM.
The first day after arriving we spent resting. The second day we went to the beach and enjoyed a picnic on the white sands beach. The third day we went to Busch Gardens, an amusement park close to where we were staying.
The next few days were very tramatic and stressful. My wife had an attack that caused her to have uncontrollable seizures and put her in the hospital in Saint Petersburg for the remainder of our vacation. Many times during the two week delay I spent a great deal of time in prayer....asking “Why?”
We were finally able to make flight connections back to Iowa. Iowa had been in the area of a dangerous winter snow storm. This Blizzard forced our flight to land in Saint Louis Missouri. My wife was highly medicated with Phenobarbital, an anti-seizure medication. She was in a wheelchair and very non-communicative. My two boys were at our side and stayed with me during all the negotiations through Lambert the St Louis airport. There were large groups of people mulling around tryin to find out-going flights due to the cancelation of most flights in the central United States.
Efforts Futile at First
My efforts were at first futile. My previous experience flying all over the US, I knew it was the obligation of our carrier to get us to our destination. I said a silent prayer and forced my way to our carrier’s ticket desk and explained that I had a sick wife and two small children and needed to get to Des Moines, Iowa as soon as possible. We then were scheduled on the next flight to Des Moines.
We landed in a mild snow storm. The major blizzard had subsided after leaving upwards of 14 inches of snow on the ground.
Returning to the motel where we had stayed and left our Toyota station wagon when we departed to Florida we discovered, to our dismay, the station wagon was almost completely buried in snow drifts. Also the snow removal equipment had pushed snow over our car when they attempted to remove the snow from the parking lot. Another time for prayer because all I had was a pair of gloves and a leather jacket to keep warm.
Dug Our Station Wagon out of the Snow
I physically with my two hands moved the snow away from the station wagon enough to drive out into the parking lot. We loaded the station wagon with out positions and ourselves and started the 30 minute trip to Perry, Iowa where we lived. We called my wife’s parent alerting them of our situation and they said they would also go to Perry to meet us
.
We had not gone 10 minutes when there came a very loud sound from under the car. I pulled to the shoulder of the road best that I could and discovered our muffler had almost totally fallen off. I removed the muffler as best that I could and returned to finish the trip to Perry. I can describe my feeling when we pulled into the driveway at our Perry home. My wife was still very quiet and under the influence of the anti-seizure medication. I again prayed that I could help remove her from the station wagon and assist her in getting to our bedroom
.
Wife’s Parents Taken to the Hospital
By the time I was able to do all that, her parents arrived. They then observed her having one of the grand mal seizures in the hallway to our bathroom. This totally disengaged them from reality and I had to take them both along with my wife and the two boys to the hospital 3 blocks away.
Moving Ahead 4 years
To make this unpleasant experience shorter, I will skip ahead 4 years. My wife had gone through 3 brain surgeries and had both hips replaced as a side effect from the steroids given to her for reduction of swelling during the second brain surgery.
There were so many times that I fell on my knees crying and asking God’s strength to sustain my own mental stress. He did and I am so grateful I recognized when it happened and thanked Him for the strength to move on.
Placed Wife in a Nursing Home
I had to place Sharon in a nursing home in February of 1995 where I ended up joining the dietary staff as a cook. I helped feed Sharon her meals and was given my meals free . I have lost track of what happened to our two boys exactly, but friends and my brother took care of them while I worked as a caregiver to my wife.
One event I will never forget was the time our pastor told me that I needed to give Sharon permission to die. I didn’t understand that at all.
Giving Wife Permission to Die
One evening after I had finished my work cooking I went up to Sharon’s room to visit and had asked God to help me explain this thing about dying to her. I went into her room and left 3 times before she finally ask me what I was doing. I told her that we needed to talk about heaven and dying. She looked me straight in my eyes and said, “David, I think you are having more trouble with this than I am.” Praise the Lord, she already had talked to God and He had comforted her long before I realized it.
Wife went to be with God on our 29th Wedding Anniversary
On June 5, 1995 Sharon was called home by the Lord. It was our 29th wedding anniversary.
I continued cooking and serving as a caregiver to the elderly until one day I scraped the bottom of my right foot on some rough cement at the side of my small home in Perry. I thought I could care for it myself but, the fact of the matter was I had discovered I had diabetes and before I knew it I was in trouble. Diabetes was causing my toe to become infected. I was admitted to the Perry hospital where my doctor and a Podiatrist informed me I was going to lose my second toe on my right foot.
Went To the State Run Hospital in Iowa City, Iowa
I made arrangements to have my pastor drive me to Iowa City Hospital where I needed to go because of having no insurance and no money to pay on my own.
By the time we got there, my toe was black and the foot was swelling from the accumulation of poison. The doctor intern began talking to me and preparing me to lose my entire foot from bone infection. I ask Pastor Charles to pray with me that God would intervene. He did and all I lost was my toe and some pride.
As I lay in my bed recovering in the Iowa City hospital, an assistant pastor from my son’s church where I had attended with my son came to visit me. He prayed over me and told me of a friend that had lost his leg in a motorcycle accident. He went on to write a book called: “One Leg in Heaven”.
Came Up with the Title “One Toe In Heaven”
I did some thinking and praying and decided I need to also write a book about my life and came up with the name “One Toe in Heaven”.
I have spent the last few years working on my book and since then have remarried to a Filipina lady and her four children. I moved to Cebu City in the Philippines in 2005 and continue writing memories of my life. I created a Blog on the Internet and regularly post new material about my past memories. It is called Dr Dave’s Memories and I entitle the Blog LILAGCS....(“Life Is Like A Grilled Cheese Sandwich”) You may visit the Blog ...just let me know and I will send you the address.
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